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“Any path leading to genuine self-realization must be intensely personal and has to deal with intensely personal problems.  The activation of the real self with its vibrating life, limitless abundance, infinite possibilities for good, and its supreme wisdom and joy happens to the exact degree that you dare take a look at the temporary truth of yourself. This means feeling what you feel; having the courage to transform yourself into a better human being for no other reason than a desire to contribute to life, rather than to make an impression and grasp for approval.”  -Pathwork Lecture # 145

June 19, 2012

Dear Gracelings,

Our next retreat is November 7-11, 2012!  Following a few introductory comments, you will find the guiding questions for our personal rigorous inquiry via Pathwork Lecture #145.

Pathwork Lectures are channelled lectures
Channeled works are by nature a bit meandering.  We need not attempt to understand them intellectually or to analyze them logically.  Instead the lectures are to be experienced; experienced through the heart and the soul.  In the last letter, we invited you to notice what stands out for you, to pause at the places in the lecture where you feel resonance and resistance, where a certain question grabs you or where a statement stops you in your tracks. If you have not had the chance to experience the lecture in this way yet, please take the time to be present with it before beginning the explorations.

Reminders
Remember that explorations are meant to be meditative.  Something happens when we put our emotional experience into written words.  We sometimes feel that the words are inadequate or that we are being forced to etch our feelings into stone.  That’s not our intention. It may be helpful to hold the exploration in meditation before journalling. Journalling is designed to be a flow, a stream of our consciousness, a soul unfoldment. So, no word becomes final.

We also recognize that sometimes what is coming through cannot be expressed in words.  We invite you to consider other forms of expression.  You might be called to draw, collage, dance, or create in some other way. Follow your heart, allow your intuition to guide you through your soul exploration.

Please Note: We are asking you to bring an artistic expression of your  “Real Self”  Commitment (part of exploration #1)  This will be part of our opening ceremony.  

Explorations
Our rigorous inquiry takes a certain format.  We begin each exploration with a quote from the lecture to ground the inner journey and then, we pose some probing question(s) to deepen our personal experience of the lecture.  There is no right or wrong way to do this.  If you find yourself going down a path that diverges from the guided questions, please go with it.  As the guide suggests “…have the courage to go with it whether or not it seems to conform with outer expectations, rules and values.  You will no longer fear when your life does not conform to convention.”

During this exploration of Pathwork Lecture #145, it is important to cultivate the stillpoint, to deepen into a mindful meditative practice.  This practice serves us to “activate the inner center of our real selves.”

Community Support
Monthly Calls with Our Support Groups: When we sit in witness to each other’s process, let us listen with beginner’s mind, empty of expectations, judgments, or reactions.  We are there to be present with each other, to mirror back what we heard, to support each other in finding our true feelings. No need to give opinion, advice or share a similar story.

Full Group Call:  We would like to set up a full group cyber-session in early September as a way to stay connected and further support each other.  Participation is optional.  We will put out a doodle to come up with the best time to hold this session.

Exploration #1:  Commitment to Real Self  

“The call of life is universal. The attitude necessary to awaken the inner center follows universal values.  Truth, love and beauty are universal aspects of the real life stream.  The isolated ego-existence is also a general state affecting all people, but how the ego blocks the real self is a personal question; what is universal is the fact that transformation of one’s character is necessary to permit the life stream to flow freely…Any path leading to genuine self-realization must be intensely personal and has to deal with intensely personal problems.”    (Pathwork Lecture #145)

Every adventure begins with a call and is often followed by an inner resistance. Throughout lecture 145, the guide asks us to examine our commitment to transformation. So, we begin with an exploration of our commitment and return to it throughout our rigorous inquiry.

A.  Honestly question yourself through journaling:  Do you truly wish to understand the call of life? What does it require of you? What is your aim in life?  What is your aim on this path?  Are you wholeheartedly responsive? Do you commit yourself completely?  What does “commitment” mean to you?  What does it look like, sound like, feel like? What holds you back? What does your resistance look like, sound like, feel like?

B.  After journaling, make an artistic expression of your “Real Self” Commitment.  Allow this clear intention to commit to the call of life be expressed through collage, dance, poetry or any other form that comes through you.

This expression will be shared as part of our opening ceremony on Wednesday night.     

Exploration #2: Seek the Real Self, Confront the Ego-Self

“The call of life is a dynamic movement that can be felt as a stream.  It manifests differently to each individual… You have all experienced to some degree through certain meditations that the universe contains unlimited good, available to you if you open yourself to it. There are times when you vividly experienced this truth, and you know without a shadow of a doubt that your experience is not coincidence  nor illusion; you know it to be fact.  When this is so, your entire attitude is clear, free and relaxed. Your whole being resonates with a positive, constructive vibration without any conflict.  You do not feel selfish for wishing to experience beauty, nor do you withhold the best of yourself.”             (Pathwork Lecture #145)

A. Write about a time in your life when you felt this at-one-ness.  Be specific and tap into as many senses as you can.

B.  Recall occasions in your life “when things did not work out in that free flowing way.“ These occasions reflect the “illusion of your separateness.”   In the deep recesses of your mind you fear that you are different from others, that you are worse, and the shame of your difference cannot be exposed.  Journal about “areas of your life where your real self is not activated, when the doors to the benevolent universe seem to be closed, when you drop into your feeling of separation, when something within you bars the way, and this something has to be found so you can eliminate it.”  Some guiding questions: “Where have I held back? Where did I not want to go all the way? Where have I lost the clarity of the aim? And where have I disconnected the aim from where I am at this moment because I do not want to expose myself?”   

C. We have the opportunity to look beyond our symptoms of ego-attachment (neurosis, sickness, distortion, unhappiness).  Removing the symptoms is a temporary solution. Instead, we can see our “symptoms” as an opportunities for transformation; recognizing that life gives us the exact experiences we need for our healing.

Journal guiding questions:  “Can you envision that more is possible?  What is this more?  How would your life be with this more?  Do you commit yourself totally to finding who you really are, what is possible for you?”

Exploration #3:  Deep Dive into Genuine Self Realization

“Give up trusting the ego exclusively and use it as a tool to activate the universal self slumbering within.”                   (Pathwork Lecture #145)

Do not judge or moralize with yourself.

A. Consider a current situation (an outer problem you wish to  change  or an inner condition you wish to overcome). How would you like this situation to be?  What gets in the way.  Journal about this. Be specific.  

B.  Although you really would like this situation to be different, it still feels impossible.  Some wall does not let you get through.  Set the intention to allow insight into the “particular character defect” that keeps you bound to a self-destructive pattern. As the guide reminds us, “Once you see it, there is still time to decide whether or not you want to give it up.  If you do not, find out why not?  The insistence upon holding onto something that violates your integrity and your decency holds back the best you have to offer and the best you can be.  This impairs your self-respect.”

As you journal about this, remember that it is not about fixing a problem. Trying to force a fixing will move you further away from your real self and hence from the reality of the life where all good is available.  INSTEAD, be present to what is happening in this moment and allow the lesson of the wall to emerge.  Journal about this over a two-week period. Be compassionate with yourself as you journal. Then, review what you have written and pull out key insights.  Write a summary paragraph.

Exploration #4:  Transformation: Finding and Activating Your Center

“Deep truth:  There is no limit to expansion.  Through this unfoldment your intuition will become strong and reliable.  You will then heed the demand of your personal life stream.  You will have the courage to go with it whether or not it seems to conform with outer expectations, rules and values.  You will no longer fear when your life does not conform to convention.

When your personality is geared to a positive soul movement, there will be no obstruction to transforming a character defect and consequently no obstruction to the unlimited abundance of good available in the universe for every single individual.           

Consciously and deliberately make the decision and commit once and for all to living life for the primary purpose of activating the real self in order to find the deep inner peace that exists even while inner errors still prevent total self-realization”.
                                    (Pathwork Lecture #145)

A.  Ask again: “What is your aim in life?  What is your aim on this path?  How far do you wish to go?  Do you want to remove only a few symptoms?  Or do you wish total self-realization, the activation of an inner center in which all good, salvation from anxiety, insecurity and confusion exist?  If so, are you willing to pay the price of perserverance, of total commitment?  The total commitment brings out your total possibilities.  The unlimited potentials of your innermost being enable you to realize unlimited good.”

B. As you live your life as a positive soul movement, you compassionately and courageously return to these questions as life unfolds:

“Find the exact point where your positive wishes are blocked, and then question what particular character defect does not permit you to abandon a self-destructive, self-denying attitude?  State clearly that you wish to find it.  Once you see it, there is still time to decide whether or not you want to give it up.  If you do not, find out why not?  The insistence upon holding onto something that violates your integrity and your decency holds back the best you have to offer and the best you can be.  This impairs your self-respect.”  (Be present to your life.  Journal, collage, dance.  Choose an expressive vehicle to get in touch with your soul movement and the new truths that are unfolding)

C.  The Guide concludes, “Those of you who have progressed and sense the excitement of a new life to come have much more to look forward to, for you will now fortify your own powers.  You will be able to activate them more and more to remove the obstacles of your remaining illusions and to orient yourself to what is eternal within yourself, what is never conflicted or tortured.  You will learn to experience it as a living reality.  Be blessed. Receive the strength and the love that stream forth.  Be in peace.  Be in God!”